Child Therapy
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What is child therapy?
Child therapy is counselling specifically tailored towards children and young people. In it’s simplest form it is a counsellor ‘therapist’ who will help your child to figure out their thoughts, feelings & behaviours in a safe environment, whereby they will not be judged or told how to think, feel or behaviour.
The start of a counselling relationship, just like any new relationship can feel scary, especially for a child entering an environment they’re not familiar with.
I have 20 years experience of working with children within the education system and 5 years experience of leading Special Educational Needs within Primary Schools. I provide a safe and secure space for your child to open up and discuss any unwanted or troublesome thoughts that they may have at present.
Having a few of your questions about the process answered prior to a first session lessens the amount of ‘unknowns’ for everyone involved.
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When should I seek help for my child?
All children are unique and develop at different ages and stages. Therefore, as soon as you are aware that your child is struggling emotionally or their behaviour has been worrying or troublesome, then the earlier they get support from a therapist/ professional, the easier it is to help them.
When you are worried about your child’s mental health, you seek advice from your family members, friends, school, GP or even a referral to CAMHS or a paediatrician just to be told that ‘they will grow out of it’ or you need to wait another ‘6 months’ etc. Sometimes this is good advice, for instance:
When a child struggles to process some life changing adjustments such as parents separating due to divorce, relocation or even death.
Changing schools especially from primary to secondary can cause anxiety and upset.
The arrival of a new sibling can cause a child to feel pushed out, unloved, jealous or even resentful of their new sibling.
Sometimes it’s not appropriate to wait! for example, when you need to take immediate action are:
Self-harm: If you discover your child has been self-harming in any way, even if they say it was a one-time thing, it’s important to get help immediately as this can progress to a serious mental health issue.
Eating disorders: The longer a child lives with an eating disorder, the harder it is to recover.
Family history: If mental illness runs in your family, be aware of the increased possibility that your child will begin to develop a disorder.
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Emotional & Behaviour Issues
Behaviour issues
A child can display behavioural issues in a variety of ways e.g. getting into trouble at school, becoming disruptive & pushing boundaries at home, becoming violent or emotionally abusive to key family members or other loved ones and / or getting into trouble with the authorities.
Such disruptive, explosive and dangerous behaviour can be often be caused by frustration, trauma or anxiety or even from an undiagnosed learning problem/difficulty etc.
Once you understand what’s behind your child’s behaviour, there are often therapies e.g. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy that can be effective in teaching your child to understand and adapt their behaviour accordingly.
However, some behavioural issues (disorders) need the intervention of a Paediatrician, Child/Educational/Behavioural psychologist who can help diagnose and treat behaviour disorders. Unfortunately, this can be a lengthy but sometimes, much needed process to with stain.
Emotional issues
Changes to your child’s emotional well being e.g. if they appear to be unusually anxious, irritable for extended periods of time, unusually sad ‘low in mood’, and it’s having a detrimental affect on their ability to function on a day to day basis, then it is important that you seek professional help straight away.
When children are suffering from emotional dysregulation e.g. they have serious anxiety or depression, they are not just suffering but they are in fact missing out on their childhood experiences, academic achievements and social interactions etc. It is really important that you seek help immediately when you recognise the changes in your child.
Unfortunately, the longer children live with such emotional issues like generalised anxiety, depression or social anxiety there is an increased likelihood that it will shape their behaviour in more harmful long-term ways causing them to become isolated and reclusive in their latter years.
Childhood Anxiety
What is Childhood Anxiety?
All children and young people feel worried or fear something sometimes, and this is a normal part of growing up. It’s a feeling that is experienced as a combination of physical sensations, thoughts and feelings. Anxiety becomes a problem when the individual feels stuck or ‘controlled by it’, this then can become overwhelming, distressing and a unmanageable experience for the child causing them to feel and become isolated from their loved ones, friends and society in general.
Symptoms of anxiety
Anxiety tends to affect a child /young person’s body, thoughts and feelings resulting in them behaving differently, including turning to certain coping behaviours to try to avoid or manage their anxiety.
Physical symptoms:
panic attacks, a racing heart, breathing very quickly, sweating or shaking
shallow or quick breathing, or feeling unable to breathe
feeling sick, dry mouth
sweating more than usual and/or getting very hot
tense muscles or wobbly legs
Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS), changes in bladder or bowel habits
Thoughts & feelings:
preoccupied by upsetting, scary or negative thoughts
nervous, on edge, panicky or frightened
overwhelmed or out of control
full of dread or an impending sense of doom
alert to noises, smells or sights
worrying, unable to cope with daily things like school, friendships and being in groups or social situations
worrying so much that it is difficult to concentrate and/or sleep
Coping behaviours:
withdrawing or isolating themselves – (not wanting to go to school, be in social or group situations)
not wanting to be away from parents or try new things
repeating certain behaviours, actions or rituals (often called ‘obsessive compulsive behaviours’)
eating more or less than usual
self-harming
Childhood Depression
What is childhood depression?
If your child is feeling depressed, their sadness and low feelings become increasingly overwhelming, persisting over a longer period of time and making day-to-day life difficult. As a parent this can be an incredibly worrying time for you and your child but, with the right support your child can come out of depression and feel okay again!
As a parent, knowing the difference between your child having a generally low mood and that of feeling depressed is important when offering the right support to them. It is useful to know that if your child is experiencing a low mood, they may feel sad, tearful, angry, worried, have less confidence and tired. However, after a few days they start to pick up and feel better as they have begun to make small changes in their life or routine etc.
Symptoms of depression
If your child or young person is depressed, their sadness and general unhappiness does not change or go away with time as it’s very difficult to shift the situation without professional support and assistance.
While every young person is different, and these feelings are often expressed differently at different ages, your child may be feeling depressed if they are consistently:
withdrawal from social situations or avoiding friends
concentration difficulties and/or losing interest in things
no desire to do things
feeling irritable or angry
feeling tearful, miserable, lonely, hopeless, empty, numb
no interest in self-care activities
being very self-critical, or feeling less confident
sleeping and/or eating more/less than normal
feeling tired or not having any energy
self-harm or suicidal ideation
If you believe your child is experiencing one or more of these symptoms, it does not necessarily mean they are experiencing depression. However, it is important that you discuss your concerns with your GP straight away.